Escanaba In Da Moonlight
And An Apology
by Rich Bruso
January 2003
So, it seems my VCR isn't talking to me anymore, and after last month's movie I don't blame it. I've run a head cleaner through a few times, but the stench still hovers in the area. I was considering calling an exorcist, but the really good ones charge too much and are booked through February. Besides, I don't know how well delicate electronics would react to holy water.
In trying to find a solution, someone suggested playing a good movie, something I would never have thought of. Hmm, it could work, but how could I accomplish this without ruining a good tape? Then it hit me: My DVD player is routed through my VCR, and DVDs are read-only. Perhaps playing a sufficiently good movie on DVD would purge the demons from my VCR. Obviously, 'good movies' fall outside my expertise, so I needed to call in an outside expert.
Enter Doug Miller, originally from Michigan. Seems there was a successful play called Escanaba In Da Moonlight, centered on a deer camp in Michigan's Upper Peninsula (UP). Somehow the people behind this play managed to scrape up the cash to make it into a movie. At first, distributors wouldn't touch it, arguing that there would be limited appeal outside of the Michigan area, but eventually a deal was hammered out, and the movie has gone on to sell more than triple the numbers expected. Hmm, a low budget comedy about deer hunting. This actually sounds like a movie I might review. If only there were some UFOs and ghosts, this would be a recipe for a truly awful science fiction movie. Wait a second, there they are: UFOs AND ghosts. And porcupine urine. All right, I gotta see this one.
Now, I know that people from the UP refer to themselves as "yoopers", but that's the extent of my UP knowledge. Fortunately, this is more knowledge than you actually need to enjoy the movie. A few references might be missed, but you don't have to be from Michigan to appreciate the funniest fart joke to ever make it into a movie.
This is the only movie ever to feature a grown man stripping to his skivvies while singing "Swing Low, Sweet Chariot." To my knowledge, it is also the first movie to feature a recipe involving milk, black flies, a moose testicle, and maple syrup. We also get to experience The Jimmer, known to the local Native Americans as "The Great White Stomach." As a side effect of his alien abduction, he is able to drink absolutely huge quantities of alcohol without effect, so now we have a new nickname for Doug. Also included in this movie are the brothers Reuben and Remnar. Reuben is 43 and hasn't bagged a single deer in his life, despite showing up for opening day every year since he was nine. As the movie states, Remnar's life was about what you would expect from a guy named Remnar.
Strange things happen at deer camp in the UP. Aliens, exploding Chevy's, sap whiskey, Euchre, and the aforementioned porcupine urine are daily hazards, at least in this movie. According to Reuben, who collected it himself, the urine is one of them aphrodisiacs, able to lure bucks in from miles around. No attempt is made to explain why any buck in his right mind would be attracted to an incontinent porcupine.
The fart joke needs to be seen to be fully appreciated, especially the close-ups where the actors appear to be subjected to extremely high g-forces. Let's just say that you should avoid, at all costs, being possessed by a forest spirit while in deer camp. Also, don't drink anything Reuben hands you, unless you're Doug. Oh, and if someone from the Department of Natural Resources shows up, treat him with the utmost respect even if he is covered in porcupine urine and wearing only his underwear and a pointy hat.
This is definitely a laugh out loud funny movie. You are about to read something I have never included, and likely never again will include, in one of these reviews: I recommend you watch this movie. Do whatever it takes, including bribing Doug with large quantities of alcohol, even if he does complain that it tastes like sap. Alternately, the local Hastings now has a copy of this fine movie, reducing the amount of beer needed to obtain a copy.
Oh, and as for the apology, I would like to apologize, in all sincerity, to the people I forced to watch last month's movie, and to my poor VCR. It is now flashing "12:00" instead of the "6:66" that was stuck on the display since our last movie, so maybe all will be well soon. As for the reading audience, no apology is necessary, as they really should have known by now not to read anything I write.
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